As an Action Learning Team Coach how would you handle the following situation:
A particularly poignant question is asked. This is followed by a long silence.
I wouldn’t do anything. Silence is good! I would wait and see if a team member made a comment, or if the question eventually got answered. It’s hard to predict how much time would have to go by with no one saying anything for me to comment. One minute? Two minutes? Ten minutes? A minute can seem like a very long time in silence, so it’s hard to imagine no one saying anything for ten minutes. Therefore, I would be inclined just to wait.
I would be patient and wait for the group to respond.
(I can envision this circumstance when a question might penetrate to an unspoken assumption about the situation – something that might challenge the organization or even an individual in the group just because it is never talked about.)
If the question literally stopped the group in its tracks after a long silence, I might ask “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” By uncovering reactions to the nature of the question, it may lead to another question from the group.
I’d take a breath and wait. Let the group sit with silence and address as they see fit. When an intervention happens, there may be an opportunity to address the silence with a powerful quesiton.
I would do the same — let the group sit with the question. It’s possible that the question opens up something new for the group, or crosses a boundary people don’t normally cross in the organization, or surfaces emotions that are “undiscussable.” If the group blows right by the question as if it were never asked, I think I’d come back to it with Larry’s question “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” or “What impact does this question have on our work as a team?”
I’d sit with the silence as well. But I love Larry’s question,”What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” and if the answer wasn’t obvious by the end of the session I think I’d ask it then.
I would also wait for the reasons already mentioned.
I may also be rejoicing internally that someone asked a question requiring deep thought. I would record the question as a potential turning point and watch for any facial expressions (discomfort, shock, anger, frustration) that might inform my next intervention. If the poignant question propels the team toward clarifying the problem and developing potential solutions, it may come up again in the learning intervention.
At the end of the session, I would probably ask the team what they viewed as the turning point, followed by how they felt when the question was asked and why. If any of the emotions I observed were not mentioned, I might ask if anyone felt differently, especially if I thought a group member might be refraining from expressing their thoughts.
I would add to the silence and allow the group to reflect on the “poignant question” for a reasonable length of time. If before intervening, the next question was posed by the group thus ignoring the previous thought provoking question I would allow the conversation to continue and make note of this question and would if I deemed it appropriate raise it at a later time. The group may have felt that although a deep question; it had no bearing on the issue at hand and therefore they chose not to address it.
On the other hand, if the silence continued and no one commented or asked another question I would ask the group ” I notice the intense silence that fell on our group as this question was brought forward. Would it be helpful in terms of solving our problem if we discussed this issue?”… alternatively I could break the silence by just saying “How are we doing?”
Silence might be King of the moment. It is appropriate for the group to reflect on the question. The purpose of a poignant question might shed light to something that no one wanted to address before (Pizza man question) or it also might be the pain someone has felt in the group and took the courage to open up.
If the question has overwhelmed the group it seems appropriate to explore the reasons and Larry’s question would fit perfectly: “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?”
If the group continues to be silent I would ask the participants to write down: “What triggered X’s question in you? Write down a word, a phrase, a feeling, a thought.” Then I would have read everyone’s answers. I am sure that the communication continue.
As a facilitator, I’d love to jump in on this one, but as an AL coach, I would have to agree with the others by simply staying quiet and waiting for the group to pick back up with the conversation. Sometimes silence and pause can be a good thing; it gives participants time to do some inward reflection and question formation.
Most likely the team is in deep reflection at the moment. I’d make note of the question and save it for the next intervention, leaving it to one of the team members to break the silence.
During the next intervention I would use this as an opportunity to reinforce something that is going well. If the great question or silence wasn’t mentioned when I asked what was going well, I would ask. “What’s the quality of our questions?”, “What really great questions have we had?” If the point question isn’t mention – “How about when Sam asked …?”, What made this a great question?” I would the use something from one of the responses to formulate a “Why is it important …?” question.
As coaches are tendencies is to focus on what needs to be fixed. Reinforcing the positive is equally important to encourage these behaviors.
The response the first time I ask one of these positive questions tends to be almost indignation… since we are doing it. Interestingly after the first intervention where I use a ‘doing well’ example the team is more inclined to notice the things they are doing well.
Allowing the silence is good. To reflect and think about the question and how it relates to you. As Dr. Bea mentions above, I agree its a great opportunity to reinforce what was done well. It allows for a much richer discussion to follow.
I would do the same. It is a great opportunity as the AL Coach to simply “hold the space” for what wants to emerge by being fully present, alert and in complete silence. No looking, squirming or fumbling around.
By ‘poignant’ I’m assuming a question that evokes an emotional response among the members? I would let the moment be and not try to fill up the silence. If people are really distracted I would ask if it is a good time for a break and give people a chance to recover. When the break is over I would ask the standard 3 questions, hoping to refocus but also hoping that this poignant question will be identified as valuable and something that moved the group process to a different level.
I would wait and appreciate that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the scripts mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
I would wait and appreciate that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the script mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
I would wait, believing that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the script mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
First, I will let the silence keep for a while. I will ask: “I notice after the question, there is a long silence. What does the silence mean? ” Then I may follow: “what are we thinking during this silence? And why?” “What’s the impact of such question, what will we do in future?”
The silence could be the inspiring moment and the poignant feeling usually implies the critical information.
I will wait the silence keep for a while. And I will ask: “I notice after the question, there is a long silence. What does the silence mean? ” Then I may follow: “what are we thinking during this silence? And why?” “What’s the impact of such question, what will we do in future?”
The silence could be the inspiring moment and the poignant feeling usually implies the critical information.
Gail Finger
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I wouldn’t do anything. Silence is good! I would wait and see if a team member made a comment, or if the question eventually got answered. It’s hard to predict how much time would have to go by with no one saying anything for me to comment. One minute? Two minutes? Ten minutes? A minute can seem like a very long time in silence, so it’s hard to imagine no one saying anything for ten minutes. Therefore, I would be inclined just to wait.
Reply
Catherine Breathnach
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Yes, I agree. I think it would be appropriate for the group to sit with the question and reflect on it.
Reply
Larry Voeller
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I would be patient and wait for the group to respond.
(I can envision this circumstance when a question might penetrate to an unspoken assumption about the situation – something that might challenge the organization or even an individual in the group just because it is never talked about.)
If the question literally stopped the group in its tracks after a long silence, I might ask “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” By uncovering reactions to the nature of the question, it may lead to another question from the group.
Reply
Alex Walker
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I’d take a breath and wait. Let the group sit with silence and address as they see fit. When an intervention happens, there may be an opportunity to address the silence with a powerful quesiton.
Reply
Valerie Lingeman
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I would do the same — let the group sit with the question. It’s possible that the question opens up something new for the group, or crosses a boundary people don’t normally cross in the organization, or surfaces emotions that are “undiscussable.” If the group blows right by the question as if it were never asked, I think I’d come back to it with Larry’s question “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” or “What impact does this question have on our work as a team?”
Reply
Martha Lappin
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I’d sit with the silence as well. But I love Larry’s question,”What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?” and if the answer wasn’t obvious by the end of the session I think I’d ask it then.
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Donna Christophersen
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I would also wait for the reasons already mentioned.
I may also be rejoicing internally that someone asked a question requiring deep thought. I would record the question as a potential turning point and watch for any facial expressions (discomfort, shock, anger, frustration) that might inform my next intervention. If the poignant question propels the team toward clarifying the problem and developing potential solutions, it may come up again in the learning intervention.
At the end of the session, I would probably ask the team what they viewed as the turning point, followed by how they felt when the question was asked and why. If any of the emotions I observed were not mentioned, I might ask if anyone felt differently, especially if I thought a group member might be refraining from expressing their thoughts.
Reply
Phil Cohen
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I would add to the silence and allow the group to reflect on the “poignant question” for a reasonable length of time. If before intervening, the next question was posed by the group thus ignoring the previous thought provoking question I would allow the conversation to continue and make note of this question and would if I deemed it appropriate raise it at a later time. The group may have felt that although a deep question; it had no bearing on the issue at hand and therefore they chose not to address it.
On the other hand, if the silence continued and no one commented or asked another question I would ask the group ” I notice the intense silence that fell on our group as this question was brought forward. Would it be helpful in terms of solving our problem if we discussed this issue?”… alternatively I could break the silence by just saying “How are we doing?”
Reply
Philipp Werenfels
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Silence might be King of the moment. It is appropriate for the group to reflect on the question. The purpose of a poignant question might shed light to something that no one wanted to address before (Pizza man question) or it also might be the pain someone has felt in the group and took the courage to open up.
If the question has overwhelmed the group it seems appropriate to explore the reasons and Larry’s question would fit perfectly: “What is it about this question that leaves everyone silent?”
If the group continues to be silent I would ask the participants to write down: “What triggered X’s question in you? Write down a word, a phrase, a feeling, a thought.” Then I would have read everyone’s answers. I am sure that the communication continue.
Reply
charles jones
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Silence is golden….
Then Larry’s question (only if you need it).
Reply
DrBea
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From Tom
As a facilitator, I’d love to jump in on this one, but as an AL coach, I would have to agree with the others by simply staying quiet and waiting for the group to pick back up with the conversation. Sometimes silence and pause can be a good thing; it gives participants time to do some inward reflection and question formation.
Reply
DrBea
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Most likely the team is in deep reflection at the moment. I’d make note of the question and save it for the next intervention, leaving it to one of the team members to break the silence.
During the next intervention I would use this as an opportunity to reinforce something that is going well. If the great question or silence wasn’t mentioned when I asked what was going well, I would ask. “What’s the quality of our questions?”, “What really great questions have we had?” If the point question isn’t mention – “How about when Sam asked …?”, What made this a great question?” I would the use something from one of the responses to formulate a “Why is it important …?” question.
As coaches are tendencies is to focus on what needs to be fixed. Reinforcing the positive is equally important to encourage these behaviors.
The response the first time I ask one of these positive questions tends to be almost indignation… since we are doing it. Interestingly after the first intervention where I use a ‘doing well’ example the team is more inclined to notice the things they are doing well.
Reply
Ronney
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I’d allow silence to continue without interrupting. Silence is a golden opportunity for deep reflection.
Reply
Christina Reis
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Allowing the silence is good. To reflect and think about the question and how it relates to you. As Dr. Bea mentions above, I agree its a great opportunity to reinforce what was done well. It allows for a much richer discussion to follow.
Reply
Erik Mazziotta
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I would do the same. It is a great opportunity as the AL Coach to simply “hold the space” for what wants to emerge by being fully present, alert and in complete silence. No looking, squirming or fumbling around.
Reply
Anne Teresa
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By ‘poignant’ I’m assuming a question that evokes an emotional response among the members? I would let the moment be and not try to fill up the silence. If people are really distracted I would ask if it is a good time for a break and give people a chance to recover. When the break is over I would ask the standard 3 questions, hoping to refocus but also hoping that this poignant question will be identified as valuable and something that moved the group process to a different level.
Reply
Eva Hirsch Pontes
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I would wait and appreciate that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the scripts mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
Reply
Eva Hirsch Pontes
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I would wait and appreciate that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the script mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
Reply
Eva Hirsch Pontes
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I would wait, believing that silence is doing a powerful work. Actually, the script mentions sometimes silence is required to process deep questions. At the end, I might incorporate a question to the group along the lines of “what did you learn about holding the space for silence?”
Reply
焮茹 杨
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First, I will let the silence keep for a while. I will ask: “I notice after the question, there is a long silence. What does the silence mean? ” Then I may follow: “what are we thinking during this silence? And why?” “What’s the impact of such question, what will we do in future?”
The silence could be the inspiring moment and the poignant feeling usually implies the critical information.
Reply
焮茹 杨
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I will wait the silence keep for a while. And I will ask: “I notice after the question, there is a long silence. What does the silence mean? ” Then I may follow: “what are we thinking during this silence? And why?” “What’s the impact of such question, what will we do in future?”
The silence could be the inspiring moment and the poignant feeling usually implies the critical information.
Reply